My Prayer

This was my journal entry last night that I wanted to share, in case other mothers out there are struggling with the same thing.  Even if you don't have children, you may still struggle with these thoughts with family and friends in your life.

I am struggling tonight~

Struggling with so many thoughts~
     Am I a good mommy?

     Am I a good wife?

     Do I make the right decisions for my family?  

     What kind of legacy am I leaving?  

The discussion I had with my children tonight was probably too deep for this eight year old brains to even grasp.  (Sometimes I don't know when to stop and make it simple.  Do you struggle with this?)  My desire for my children today is - I want them to desire Jesus more than anything in this world!  But how do you explain that to them when they are being taught by so many outside influences to want the things in this world.  They want the next toy that can entertain them.  Or they want the latest fashion.  And I am reminded of a question that I really don't want to answer.  Why?  Because I know the answer.  The answer is a swift kick in my booty.  So what is the question, you may be asking yourself.

Am I investing time in my children?  Of course you say.  You are a good mommy.  I see you with your children and they love you.  But Am I really investing "quality" time in my children?  Am I teaching them what it truly means to follow Jesus?  Am I teaching them by example?  Am I spending time reading God's word with them?

And the raw reality is NO.

That Hurts MY Heart!

Yes, I spend time with my children but I must admit that it is not always quality time.  I am just there...  I am doing activities with them but sometimes they are not things that are pouring God's word into them or teaching them about the important things in this life.

If I want my children to desire Jesus more than anything in this world,
    it is my responsibility to teach them what it means to truly follow Jesus.
           It is my responsibility to spend time with them daily reading His word.

Tonight, we talked about hearing Your voice.  Noah asked me "how do you know God is talking to you?'  I told him that the more time you spend in prayer, reading His word and talking with Him, you will begin to hear God's voice and know it is God speaking to you.  I explained that he knows my voice because he spends time with me daily.  He has heard mommy's voice from the time he was in my womb, so he knows it is me that is speaking to him.  Of course he went on to say "but I don't hear His voice out loud like I do yours."  I assured him that he will know when God is speaking to him.

I want the best for my children and my family, and I know that a relationship with Jesus is what is best for them.  But I also know that I can't make them have these same desires or have a relationship with Jesus.  My prayer Father is that You will use me in my children's life to teach them about you and trust that you will do the rest.

These same thoughts of "am I investing time in my children", I also have for my husband.  Am I really investing in our marriage?  Am I showing my husband that I honor and respect him? Do we spend time communicating about our day?  Do we communicate our needs and desires to one another?  These are questions we all should ask ourselves and evaluate our priorities.  I can recall a conversation I had with my youth group a little over 10 years ago about priorities.  I remember telling them that God should be first in their parent's life, then their spouse and then came the children.  They looked at my like I had lost my mind.  But if you are to have a healthy biblical centered marriage, this should be your model as well.  God should be the most important person in your life.  Your spouse should be second and if you have children, they should be third.  Anything else like other family members, work, or friends should not be in those first three positions in your life.  You may disagree with me and that is okay but God's word shares about this very thing.  Evaluate your life this morning and see what is taking priority in your life.  Are you investing time in your relationship with Jesus?  Are your investing in your marriage?  Are you investing in your children?

My prayer this morning is ~
     for my children to walk with Jesus daily,
     for them to know Him in only a way that an 8 year old can know Him,
     that they will be content with where they are and what they have,
     that Josh and I will invest quality time with them daily,
     that Josh and I will continue to invest in our marriage,
     and that I would be content in my own life, so that I can lead by example.

What is your prayer this morning for your life, for your spouse and for your children?  I would love to hear from you.  Let us all join each other in prayer for our priorities to be refocused on where they should be.